My Response to Charles L Worley

The most recent clergy harangue against LGBTQI people comes from a North Carolina Baptist pastor named Charles L. Worley. In a logic defying tirade, he says that LGBTQI, or more accurately "lesbians and queers," should be put behind an electric fence, fed (let's not be mean, after all), and kept until they die. Because, once they die there will be no more homosexuality.

Mark Sandlin at The God Article has advocated for a clever response to this "sermon" - send donations to LGBTQI friendly organizations in Charles L. Worley's name and send him a postcard or an email telling him. I did just that. Here is my email to Charles L. Worley.

"I have given a donation to Beyond the Bridge in your honor. Beyond the Bridge is an organization in Seattle that works to eliminate lgbtqi suicides with a special emphasis on teenager mental health. I want you to know that as a result of your hate-laced sermon, not only have I made a donation, but many, many more people are sending donations to organizations like BTB.

I am a pastor in Seattle, Washington. Our world is too polarized and too hate-filled. The God to whom I bow and the Jesus whom I follow do not instruct us to hate. Proof texting the Bible will lead to no good end. For every verse about love I put here, you will put up a scripture from Romans or Leviticus. For every scripture you cite, I can cite one equally as powerful. In the end, this is a question of faith - trust. I trust a loving God. I am not sure who you trust.

I pray for your soul. I pray for those whom you have harmed with your hate. I pray for your church. And, I pray for Christianity, which has become too well known as a place of ignorance and hate rather than a movement of love, justice, and compassion."

Is this a little snarky of me to do? Probably. But, it is also an earnest response. Over and over again, hateful people say the most evil things in the name of the God I worship. They take the word that I use to describe myself - "Christian" - and they twist and turn it into something wholly unrecognizable. I am exhausted from conversations with people who say, "Oh, I know about Christianity. I grew up in a church. They hate gays and are hypocritical about everything." Well, of course we're hypocritical; we're human, after all, but there is something we can do about being known for "hating gays." We can say without reservation that while theological difference is fine, hate is never fine. We can denounce those who kidnap our faith and hold it hostage. We can love our hurting children and tend the wounds that hate-mongering has inflicted on our brothers and sisters.

My next blog post was going to be called "Generosity is the Real Radicality." (Yes, I know "radicality" isn't a word). It was going to be about the hyper-partisan language wielded like a weapon in both civil discourse and sectarian discourse. It was going to highlight the need for a more generous dialogue about real and significant difference. I'll get to it, but first I had to respond to Charles L. Worley. I hope, though, that in doing so I have found some footing in the realm of generosity. But, I equally hope that I am clear in my point of view.

Hate is not acceptable. Hurting others is not acceptable. There is nothing godly or civil about it. It is not generous. I will not return Worley's unkind words to him, but I will not cloak my response in milquetoast language or pretend that my response is not strong and visceral. I will never change the minds of people like Charles L. Worley with proof texting the Bible; I will also never change them by meeting their hate with hate of my own. The Christian walk - to be a Follower of the Way - requires that I find a different response to hate. It requires that I love my enemy, pray for him earnestly, seek reconciliation, and work tirelessly for a hate-free world. Today, I hope I have approximated that requirement by letting Charles L. Worley know two things: His hate will not overcome God's love. And, this Christian pastor loves LGBQI people and sent money to a queer positive organization as proof of that love.

John Dominic Crossan at Queen Anne UMC May 26-27

John Dominic Crossan comes to Queen Anne United Methodist Church May 26-27 as the next facilitator in our program "The Well, a gathering place for conversation." Speaking on his new book "The Power of Parable: How Fiction by Jesus Became Fiction about Jesus," Crossan will lecture three times and preach during worship on Pentecost Sunday.

The schedule for the weekend begins Saturday, May 26, with a lecture at 7 PM. Sunday begins with worship; John Dominic Crossan will preach during worship, which begins at 10 AM. In the afternoon, he will give two additional lectures beginning at 3 PM. Book sales and book signing will take place on Sunday.

"The Well" has focused on narrative and story during our early weeks. Robert V Taylor spoke about his book in which he uses his own spiritual journey as a tour guide for the reader along his or her own journey. Carrie Newcomer led a workshop called "Our Lives as Sacred Story." In June, Kathleen Norris will speak about time - our use and misuse of it - drawing from her book "Acedia and Me." And, in July, poet and activist Luis Rodriguez will join us, also taking on the theme of story.

John Dominic Crossan asserts that Christians can't get 21st Century Christianity right if we don't understand 1st Century Christianity. His work attempts to make Jesus, his followers, his Jewish context, and the early Christian movement real for Christians today.

His most recent book dissects the linguistic tool Jesus most used - the parable. Jesus spoke about the "kingdom" by telling stories. Yet, Christians very quickly lost that focus in order to emphasize Jesus himself. Why is that? What does it mean? What can we learn from Jesus' own teachings?

These are questions that thinking, questioning, and maturing Christians should attempt to answer.

The weather has finally turned nice in Seattle. It is Folklife that weekend. There are lots of reasons to be distracted, but I encourage folks in the Seattle area to sign up and come. Email us at thewellqueenanne@gmail.com or call at 206-282-4307 for tickets. The event is free and open to the public with a suggested donation of $30 for the full series of lectures.

This Gay Pastor Responds to General Conference

Over the past couple of weeks the internet has been replete with articles, blog posts, facebook updates, and tweets about the decision made at General Conference of The United Methodist Church to maintain language stating that "homosexuality is incompatible with Christian teaching." I actually don't want to rehash most of what has been said. Whether it's Chuck Currie (a UCC pastor preaching at First UMC in Portland), Sandy Brown (pastor at First UMC in Seattle), or others across the nation, most of what needs to be said has been said. Simply put, the decision to continue the marginalization of LGBTQI people is wrong. It is not about biblical authority or holiness. Rather, it is about power and fear of difference. For those who hold a theology that is challenged by fluid sexual identity or sexual orientation, there is more graciousness and kindness in stating that good Christians of good conscience disagree. Those who won't name our disagreement are much more interested in being right than loving, more interested in having power over than being in community with, more invested in shoring up their world views than being changed by the Other. These are my thoughts and they belong to no other person. I own them all.

My facebook wall has been filled with responses to General Conference - responses which range from disappointment to outrage, from the uncertainty of whether people can continue inside this polarized and broken denomination to deep sorrow because the bigotry of the general church is at odds with and doesn't reflect the love and welcome people have personally experienced in their local congregations. A number of these posts have been made by young adults and others who tuned in or attended General Conference for the first time this year. Others have been slogging through the debate on human sexuality quadrennium after quadrennium and they despair of any motion toward inclusion.

To be honest, I am more heartbroken over how other people have been hurt by General Conference than I am directly wounded by it. If I weren't somewhat inured to the issue by now, I would have left this denomination a long time ago. And, trust me, I've thought about it. Long and hard, I've thought about it. Today, however, I feel freed from the marginalization of the church (well, most of the time I do). A while ago, I decided to be honest about who I am, what I believe, and what I'm called to do; if the United Methodist Church provides a place for me at the table, so be it. If not, so be it. I don't say this flippantly. You see, my family is a generationally Methodist one. Not one, but two of my ancestors were Circuit Riders back in the early days of the movement. I can trace my family back to the very beginning of the Church of England. The Anglican way is part of me. The Wesleyan movement has left indelible marks on me. The Wesleyan Quadrilateral, Wesley's sermons, our hymnody, the idea of itinerating clergy, free will, prevenient grace, practical divinity - these are all deeply rooted in how I experience God and how I mediate God to others. However, I do not bow down to The United Methodist Church; I bow before God, and none other (at least that is to what I aspire). So, when I see this glorious movement, this wonderful heritage, wasted in worthless acts of evil and oppression, I hurt. When I hear young adults wonder how their church as a global body can differ so much from their local congregation, my heart breaks. When clergy who haven't been able to leave their closets come to me and cry in uncertainty about their place in this denomination, I cry with them.

There are those who like to quote scripture - five to seven specific scriptures - about how homosexuality is against human nature and God's plan for humankind. And, I don't want to parse those scriptures here. I'm willing to say, "Okay. Let's say that's right. So what?" That usually throws people off. They expect me to try an explain those scriptures away or to step into church apologetics, to get my "revisionist exegesis" on. I certainly can do that because the scriptures trotted out and put on display have absolutely nothing to do with homosexuality, but I very often choose not to do that because arguing won't change people's minds. Rather, I have found that I have to step away from the debate, not because I am afraid of "losing" or because I can't match them scripture for scripture (I can), but because experience (one of the four components of the Wesleyan Quadrilateral) has taught me that debate and argument do not equal holy conferencing; they do not change anyone's mind. And so, I reply with the question, "So what?" There are no biblical literalists. There aren't. There are biblical fundamentalists, Evangelicals, charismatics, and so forth, but there aren't literalists. The Bible is always interpreted. We have made many decisions over the past two millennia about our relationship with scripture. It is our holy book. It is our story. It is God's Word. It is not something to take literally, not if we take it seriously. My question of "so what" is not a challenge to scripture; it is a challenge to the person abusing it. I simply call them on their arbitrary use of God's word, which I believe is a violation of the first three of the 10 Commandments, which leads all too often to the violation of the sixth and ninth commandments.

Instead of arguing, I pray for the salvation of those who say unspeakable things about me. I pray for those who enliken me to someone engaged in bestiality, pedophilia, murder, rape, and torture (all of which have been used in comparisons directly to me). At General Conference in 2000, an African delegate actually said that homosexuality results from a witch's curse, to which American delegates in opposition to homosexuality nodded in agreement and applauded. I had no choice except to believe that a significant portion of the Southern delegates believe in witchcraft or they were willing to use an African delegate to promote their own political aims. I left and prayed for them all. The narrowness of their heart must be a burden. I have come to believe in something I once deeply resisted for both theological and linguistic reasons: I have become a prayer warrior.

The United Methodist Church failed to live into something better, something more humane, something more Godly. It decided to stay locked in a pattern of fear, scapegoating, and namecalling. What it - what WE - did this General Conference was to contribute to the death of every LGBTQI person who commits suicide. Their blood is on our house. Every time religious language is lifted as a club used to spiritually bludgeon a beautiful child of God who wants to live fully the way in which God has created them to be, it steals something of their soul until too many hurting and soul-weary people take their own lives or live in fear, or they hide in dark and cold closets (a form of living suicides). We - The United Methodist Church - have decided through debate and democracy to participate in aiding their deaths.

In response to our decision, I feel the need to state here in public what many already know about me. But let this be a clear statement of what I think, who I am, and how I intend to minister:  To LBGTQI people and those who love them, the church is wrong. You are beautiful and wonderfully made. You are a child of God. This pastor will baptize you, confirm you, commune with you, perform your weddings, bury you, and invite you into positions of leadership. I will continue to lift my voice and offer my body as a witness to God's radical welcome. To delegates feeling dejected, thank you for all you have done for me. I am reminded that the central image in our faith is a cross, a symbol of systematized pain used to shame and humiliate. In order to love, Jesus gave up power. I choose to continue to love and walk the way of the cross with him.

Effectiveness or Entitlement: The Lie About Guaranteed Appointments

Today the United Methodist Church radically changed how pastors are sent to local congregations. The worldwide church body called General Conference ended the ages long practice of guaranteed appointments in which ordained elders are guaranteed full time employment as long as they go where their bishop sends them. This is, of course, an oversimplification of the process, but that is the basic agreement. Pastors may be sent anywhere within the episcopal area (in my area, that is the state of Washington and parts of Idaho) for one year at a time, although rarely does a pastor remain for only one year. In turn, every ordained elder is guaranteed a place to go. The assumption in recent years is that this guarantee or "entitlement," as some have put it, has become a drive to mediocrity and our clergy are simply underperforming.

Proponents of ending guaranteed appointments have framed the conversation as a choice between "entitlement to full time work" or "effectiveness." We can't, they state, have both. I want to put an end to this fallacy. The guarantee is not an entitlement, a word that I believe has been chosen to elicit negative emotions from people who think ill of social entitlements. Entitlement seems to indicate a gift to which a person has contributed nothing. I know that this is not what the word actually means, but I believe it has been used on purpose for this reason. Yet, this is not the case. Clergy agree to itinerate in return for the appointment. Moreover, clergy also agree to a whole evaluative process that could include involuntary leave should they be found ineffective. The guaranteed appointment is not an entitlement. It is not an unearned gift; it is part of a larger agreement - in church speak, we call it a covenant.

Effectiveness, these same people maintain, has been driven into the ground by the taken for grantedness of our positions. Effectiveness, which can be measured by metrics, must be measured in our pastors with only the effective ones sent to our churches. Like every other United Methodist, I want our congregations served by only the best clergy - smart, outgoing, administratively aware, liturgically proficient, evangelistic, visionary, prayerful, pastoral, prophetic, and connectional. Of course, we thrive in some of these categories more than in others, but we should be able to do all of them with a reasonable degree of skillfulness. Where I begin to have a problem is at the point that we directly correlate church growth with effectiveness and we tie the guarantee to the loss of church growth.

We live in the death throes (some would say after the death throes) of Christendom. If every United Methodist pastor could preach with the fervor of John Wesley, heal with the mastery of Jesus, sing with the voice of Miriam, envision with the eye of Jacob, witness with the power of Mary, evangelize with the commitment of Paul, and organize with the strong hand of Peter, we would never recover our identity in Christendom. And, God bless us for it. Christendom was a horrible pairing of government and religion. It was an imperial manifestation of something wholly anti-imperial - God's kingdom. We must, with clarity and compassion, close churches that need closing, make strategic plans about where new churches need planting, and creatively envision a multitude of ways for us to embody "church." It is time for us to focus on growing a strong, deep, and mature faith in our congregations and let go of reclaiming the hegemony of a time gone by. Mourn it. And, let it go, people.

Next, we live into this newly forming world learning how to be deeply committed to our identity, alive in sharing our gospel, joyful about life in God, and prophetic about a world that is just and compassionate. This will result in some large congregations, many small congregations, and newly emerging communities which may strain the understanding of what "congregation" means.

What do we do with clergy who simply don't perform well? First of all, we shouldn't ordain them. Year after year, I sit in clergy sessions when we pass people through who are clearly lovely and sweet and beautiful but not gifted for ordained ministry. As much as we want a big tent, there are some things a pastor must be able to do - relate with people across difference, preside over a service with grace and gravity, talk to people outside of the church without condemnation and with invitation, and so on. Some of us good book reading pastors are not suited to the relational life of a pastor. Conversely, some of our more extroverted pastors have entered this profession as failed performers rather than as clergy. Don't argue. You know it's true. There are stop gaps at the front end of ordination that we could and should employ to keep us true to the sacred act of ordaining people who will care for our congregations, mediate the sacraments, and tend to our communities. For those times that we wind up ordaining people who seemed competent at their ordination but who haven't proven this promise true, we have processes for helping them exit ministry.

In Para 350 of the Book of Discipline, it maintains that "Evaluation is a continuous process for formation in servant ministry and servant leadership that must take place in a spirit of understanding and acceptance. Evaluation serves as a process for pastors to assess their effectiveness in ministry and to discern God's call to continue in ordained ministry." Right there, annual evaluations should help local pastors discern effectiveness and determine whether God still calls them to continue in ordained ministry. For those in need, further education may be required. For those in need, they can take a "leave of absence," whether that be voluntary of involuntary. Involuntary leaves may be the result of a complaint process. The complaint process, while it includes all of the things most people assume (theft, sexual abuse, etc), can also include an "administrative complaint" - "If the bishop determines that the complaint is based on allegations of incompetence, ineffectiveness, or unwillingness or inability to perform ministerial duties, he or she shall refer the complaint as an administrative complaint to the board of ordained ministry for its consideration of remedial or other action" (Para 362.2).

So, we have processes already in our system for dealing with ineffectiveness, why end the guaranteed appointment? Because we don't avail ourselves of these processes. We have fostered an avoidant culture. Rather than dealing with this avoidant culture, we create another process, which will not work either unless we are willing to take a look at who, why, and how we ordain in the first place.

It may surprise many that I am not opposed to ending guaranteed appointments. I contend, however, that in getting rid of the guarantee, we should also get rid of the appointment system. There is nothing wrong with a call system, especially one with episcopal input like the one used by Lutherans. The bishop supplies the congregation with a short list of names of clergy who might fit their missional profile. They interview and select from that list. It's a collaborative process that would fit our connectional system nicely. However, doing away with the guarantee and keeping the appointment process strains an already strained process and attempts to 'fix' something not fixable. The guarantee is not the reason for our shrinking membership roles, although mediocre pastors may play a part. Mediocrity and guaranteed appointments do not go hand in hand, and, thus, comes the lie of the choice made at General Conference: Effectiveness or Entitlement.

*Others have raised the alarm on things like congregational resistance to minority clergy, the prophetic voice, and so on. I chose not to deal with these because I think my argument is even more foundational. The choice needn't have been made at all.

Carrie Newcomer at The Well on May 12

Grammy winning artist Carrie Newcomer comes to Queen Anne UMC's "The Well, a gathering place for conversation" on May 12. At 2 PM she leads a workshop called "Our Lives as Sacred Story." At 7:30 PM she performs a concert. Both in the sanctuary. All are welcome (the workshop is capped at 30 people).

In "Our Lives as Sacred Story" (2-4 PM) Carrie invites participants to explore and honor the depth, grace, and wonder of their personal stories. The workshop uses conversation, exploratory writing, group and individual experiences designed to facilitate a spiritual framing of daily life. It is a safe and encouraging workshop. Whether you have a history of writing or whether you are interested in exploring new ways to tell your spiritual story, you will find this workshop welcoming. Reserve your place now. The workshop is limited to 30 people. It, like the concert is free, with a suggested donation of $10.

In the evening concert (7:30-9:00 PM), Carrie, her guitar, and her musical partner Gary will use music to open up the sacredness of the world. Described by Barbara Kingsolver as "poet, storyteller, snake-charmer, good neighbor, friend and lover, minister of the wide-eyed gospel of hope and grace" as well as being labeled "a soaring songstress" by Billboard, Carrie won a Grammy for her song "I Should've Known Better" recorded by Nickel Creek. She has toured with Alison Krauss and collaborated with Mary Chapin Carpenter. In 2009 and 2011, Carie was invited to tour India as a cultural ambassador for the American Embassy. Her most recent recording is called "Everything is Everywhere" and features the master of the Indian classical sarod Amjad Ali Khan. She is currently collaborating with Parker Palmer in retreats based on his book "Healing the Heart of Democracy." The concert is free with ticket required for admission and a suggested $10 donation.

For either the concert or the workshop, please email thewellqueenanne@gmail.com or call at 206-282-4307.

Cornel West and Tavis Smiley Vist to Queen Anne UMC

On April 24, Queen Anne UMC's new ministry "The Well, a gathering place for conversation" was honored to welcome Cornel West and Tavis Smiley. At lunch, they spoke about their new book "The Rich and the Rest of Us: a Poverty  Manifesto." About 130 of Seattle (and the surrounding area's) religious and community leaders, activists for justice, and witnesses for compassion came together. We were Buddhist, Jewish, Muslim, Christian, and secular humanists. Our creeds and beliefs may differ, but our passion for justice is shared.

For a limited time - only one week - audio of the talk will be on Queen Anne UMC's website. If you want to hear what Tavis Smiley and Cornel West had to say, listen before the audio is taken down.

Personally, it was such a treat to welcome Cornel West back to a church I'm serving. And, it was a real pleasure to meet Tavis Smiley. Gracious men with prophetic words.

Queen Anne UMC is a tiny neighborhood church. We are not a cathedral, a mega-church, or even a large downtown church. We are tucked away on Queen Anne hill - just up the hill from downtown Seattle. We don't have a parking lot. We aren't on a bus line. We are one of thousands upon thousands of small neighborhood churches that dot neighborhoods across this country. We do have a beautiful worship space, dedicated members, and a desire to offer God's grace to the larger community. That is what gave birth to our new minsitry "The Well." Designed as an intimate space for big conversation, national (and even international) speakers, leaders, scientists, poets, dreamers, and scholars are coming to this church tucked away on a hill, and they are leading us in ongoing dialogue about faith, mind, body, and community. We are happy to be able to share a little piece of our experience with any who would like to join us.

Here's a link to the audio from Tuesday's talks. Thank you, Tavis Smiley and Cornel West. Stay strong!

"The Well, a gathering place for conversation" Welcomes Robert V Taylor

Robert V Taylor spoke with KUOW's Steve Scher about his new book "A New Way to Be Human." His segment begins about minute 21. Take a listen.

He will be joining us at The Well on April 18 at 6:30. Come join us.

A Prayer for 4-15-12

God of Life and Love, with joy we celebrate the season of our Lord's resurrection. By the grace of Christ among us, fill us with the breath of your peace, touch us with the wounds of the world, feed us with Christ's humility, bind us together in love and community, and bathe us in your warm light. Open us to your presence around us that we, like Thomas, may declare, "My Lord and my God." And, in the mystery of your "eighth day," make us a new creation, raised with Christ, alive in your most precious world. We pray with the confidence of Thomas. Amen.

Robert V Taylor, Cornel West, Tavis Smiley, Carrie Newcomer, John Dominic Crossan, Kathleen Norris, and One Little Church

Queen Anne United Methodist Church has started a new ministry called "The Well, a gathering place for conversation." Born out of a belief that a more just and compassionate society is made when we engage in dialogue over time and in community, "The Well, a gathering place for conversation" aspires to facilitate such conversation.

The ministry began with a small, four-week Bible study led by Wes Howard-Brook and Sue Ferguson Johnson.

It continues on April 18 with a dialogue with Robert V Taylor about his new book "A New Way to Be Human." Please reserve your tickets now. 6:30 PM - 8:30 PM.

Tavis Smiley and Cornel West will join invited guests for a private lunch to discuss justice and community. They will be in town promoting their new book "The Rich and the Rest of Us: a poverty manifesto."

Record unemployment and rampant corporate avarice, empty houses but homeless families, dwindling opportunities in a paralyzed nation—these are the realities of America, land of the free and home of the new middle class poor. Award-winning broadcaster Tavis Smiley and Dr. Cornel West, one of the nation’s leading public intellectuals, take on the “p” word—poverty. They challenge all Americans to re-examine their assumptions about poverty in America—what it really is and how to eradicate it.

Pick up your tickets to see them during the evening of April 24 at the Neptune theater in Seattle.

Then, on May 12, Grammy winning recording artist Carrie Newcomer will join us to lead a workshop called "Our Lives as Sacred Story" and perform an evening concert. Described by Barbara Kingsolver as a "poet, storyteller, snake-charmer, good neighbor, friend and lover, minister of the wide-eyed gospel of hope and grace" as well as by Rolling Stone, "a voice as rich as Godiva chocolate," Carrie Newcomer may be a name you don't know, but it is one that you should know. She has toured with Alison Krauss Europe and she wrote the song Grammy winning song "I Should've Known Better," which was recorded by Nickel Creek. Her most recent album is "Everything is Everywhere," recorded with master of the Indian classical sarod Amjad Ali Khan and it benefits the Interfaith Hunger Initiative. She is currently collaborating with Parker Palmer in concert and retreats based on his book "Healing the Heart of Democracy."

Her workshop is limited to 30 people. Reserve your place now. Also, reserve a ticket for her concert at 7:30 PM on May 12.

Over Memorial Day weekend, John Dominic Crossan will be on site to lead conversations about parables and the kingdom. He will preach Pentecost Sunday as well.

We begin June with Kathleen Norris on June 6.

The whole year is lined up with recording artists, poets, scientists, dreamers, law makers, activists, Bible scholars, educators, and theologians.

But, in the end, the conversation is only as rich as the questions of the people who show up. The core of this ministry is that it is "intimate space, big conversation." Bring your whole selves and engage with your neighbor in struggling for a more just and compassionate world.

And, the conversation is just getting started.

For more information, please check out our website.

Why Zimmerman's Account Doesn't Matter

Since everybody in the country has weighed in on the Trayvon Martin case, I thought I would throw in my opinion, ill-formed as it is, from nothing but news accounts. Doesn't that make you want to read this? But, given the debate around race that this has sparked, with today's anniversary of the assassination of Martin Luther King, Jr., and with this week marking the most holy week on the Christian calendar, I thought I would toss in a very simple contribution to this national dialogue: I don't care whether Zimmerman's account is 100% true; he deserves to be arrested and prosecuted. And, this is why.

He called 911, informed him of the situation, and was told not to pursue the "suspicious" person...and he did.

End of story.

So, let's back up: What made Trayvon "suspicious" in the first place? What made Zimmerman say "the guy looks like he's up to no good, or he's on drugs or something?" Well, it was raining...and he was walking...yes, walking. And, according to Zimmerman, "looking at houses."

I walk in my neighborhood and look at houses all the time. I live in Seattle, so I definitely walk in the rain - a lot. I look at people's gardens, check out their houses - their colors, their paint selections, whether they are having any work done. I have never been stopped by the police for doing this, even while wearing a hooded rain coat. Why? What makes Trayvon different from me? I'm a white woman. He was a six foot tall black young man.

I've been around long enough to know that if I were to be stopped, all I would have to do is smile and say "hi" and ask how the police officer is doing. Nice. Friendly. All good. If I were stopped by a neighbor, all I would have to say is, "I live around the corner. It's nice to meet you." And, that would be that. Why? I am a white woman.

Trayvon didn't have this chance. His neighbor didn't say, "Hi! I haven't met you before. I live around the corner. Did you just move here?" No. Zimmerman called the police. While not a polite thing to do just because someone is walking in the neighborhood, it is not a criminal thing to do. But, it set into motion events that would end in the death of a teenager.

After Zimmerman has some back and forth with dispatch and does a lot of staring at Trayvon, Trayvon gets scared and runs away on the advice of his girlfriend. What does Zimmerman do? He goes after him. This is the key part. He goes after him. He pursues him. And, he does so in defiance of the police dispatcher. "Are you following him?" "Yeah," says Zimmerman. Dispatch: "Ok, we don't need you to do that." Zimmerman: "Ok." And, yet, he continues to pursue him.

Flash forward.

Enhanced video released today indicates that Zimmerman did have wounds to his head. How did those come about? What constitutes self-defense?

If a guy is walking down the street and I decide to follow him, can I shoot him because he looks mean? What if he stops and looks in some windows? Can I shoot him? What if I am following him and he decides to run away from me and I run after him and he gets upset and turns back to confront me? Can I shoot him and it be self-defense? It seems to me that in every one of these cases, I am the aggressor. He is the one acting in self-defense. I don't care how weird, suspicious, or mean he looks, I am the one acting. He is responding.

So, without knowing anything else..even taking Zimmerman fully at his word...it doesn't matter. Maybe Trayvon, all of a sudden, on the way home from buying a soda and some candy decided to turn into a thief. He decided on this rainy night to try his hand at breaking and entering even though he had never done that before. He just up and wanted to become a burglar. Let's say that's all true (although I don't believe it for a second). Let's say that Trayvon ran and eventually turned around and challenged Zimmerman. Let's say that he even threw the first punch. It all comes down to this to me: He was chased. He was pursued. He was acting in self defense.

On this day when I wish I could celebrate that the Reverend Martin Luther King, Jr.'s vision had come to pass - that vision of a different world in which people were judged on the content of the character - I cannot. Women are murdered for wearing an hijab. Boys are shot for wearing a hoodie. And countless people are stopped for "walking while black" and the "fortunate" ones are the ones who get to go home humiliated and infuriated. This is not King's dream.

In this week when I wish I could celebrate an Easter with no Good Friday - that is, I wish that I could celebrate living fully in God's reign - a reign of peace, justice, and compassion, I cannot. We continue to crucify the peaceful and the weak, the least and the last, the marginalized and the poor. We live in a world too full of Good Fridays and too few Easter moments. This Holy Week we read of children tortured by their governments (Syria), women murdered for their religion (Shaima Alawadi), boys killed in their own gated communities, and police officers shot 28 times by their fellow officers. It doesn't matter to me if these folks broke the law or not, none of them deserves what happened to them. And, that, is the depth of the lament in Good Friday. Good Friday is not a remembrance of the execution of one man 2000 years ago, it is an entering in to the ways in which we still kill the divine and sacred among us every single day.

So, I don't care if Zimmerman's account is factual or not, it simply doesn't matter.

Poet Luis Rodriguez @The Well, July 19

"Art is the heart's explosion on the world. There is probably no more powerful force for change in this uncertain and crisis-ridden world than young people and their art. It is the consciousness of the world breaking away from the strangle grip of an archaic social order." - Poet and Author Luis Rodriguez

@The Well on July 19

"The Well, a gathering place for conversation" is a new ongoing dialogue about faith, life, community, mind, body, and the world. We believe that regular dialogue over time and in community creates a more just and compassionate society. "The Well, a gathering place for conversation" is an intimate space for big conversation. Join us.

Our schedule continues to grow and change. Be sure to keep checking back: www.qaumc.org/the-well

15 Reasons Why I Am Tired of Lists of About Leaving Church

Recently, the internet has been replete with a spate of lists about why people left/leave Church. They contain nothing new, really. Just yesterday, as I was driving and listening to the radio, NPR aired an interview with Anne Rice about her surprising return to the Catholic church and her equally abrupt departure from it. Everywhere one turns there are more people giving voice to the failures of Church.

We are living in a time of deep change as Christendom gives way to...well, we don't know what it is giving way to. That, in part, is what drives Christian conservatism to flail ever more wildly as it tries to keep Christendom alive and well. What the folks involved in this failing flailing haven't figured out is that Christendom is already dead. And, good riddance, as far as I am concerned.

It is important not to confuse Christianity, or, (even more broadly) being followers of Jesus, with Christendom. Christendom, in its most broad definition, refers to the worldwide community of Christians. However, the word is very rarely used this way. It has become synonymous with geopolitical power in the West. Once Christianity and Empire became entwined, their separation was impossible. That is, Christendom more often than not refers to a political manifestation of Christian symbology and ideology intrinsically bound to nationalistic pride, culture, Western values, and Empire. In short, Christendom is the political Christian world, a relatively hegemonic expression of what life is and how political life should and will be ordered. As the Western world grew in influence, Christendom was its main expression. We are living in a time of power redistribution and demythologization. The fact that people defend Christendom is evidence enough that it has already died. One doesn't have to defend, protect, or even name that which is taken for granted as real.

In her book Christianity After Religion Diana Butler Bass takes on the waning influence of churched Christianity as it has been incarnate in our world. The structures - denominations and other identity labels - are being broken down as the categories no longer suffice in mediating the world and God and us, presenting a coherent world view, or in facilitating spiritual life. People are transgressing categories which used to help us understand who we are and who the "other" is. Words like post-Evangelical, post-denominational, Emergent, emerging, Emergo-_____, and neo_____ are being thrown around in Christian communities with wild abandon. People are starting to describe themselves as post-theistic Christian or Jesus follower rather than Christian at all. The "taken for granteds" within certain categories can no longer be counted on. Protestants are taking up Benedictine patterns of life and faith. Evangelicals are not necessarily Republican. Conservative Roman Catholics and conservative Evangelicals are forming alliances that once would have been unheard of. The neatly arranged religious world that helped, significantly helped, us shape our political and social worlds is giving way as old and insufficient meanings are eroding and new ones have yet to emerge. What results is chaos.

The death of Christendom is something I applaud and I mourn. Nothing is more dangerous than a government - an Empire - which can rely upon the persuasive language of religion. Once a government can rally the people on God's behalf, there is no campaign that won't be undertaken. When nationalistic symbols and religious symbols are wedded, the potential for Empire expansion, the abuse of power, and the marginalization of the minority is exponentially increased. And, yet, I was formed in Christendom. Beautiful cathedrals amaze me. Churches full of families make me happy. I am reflective enough to know that as much as I cheer the divorce of the Empire-Christian marriage, I am a child of it.

Given the reality in which we live, it isn't a surprise that people are finding it easier to name the failings of Church - of Christianity. What does surprise is how invisible the Mainliners are in our national dialogue about Christendom and Christianity. After all, the Mainline Church was the primary incarnation of Christendom in the US. In her list about why she left church, Rachel Held Evans includes things like: "I left the church because I believe the earth is 4.5 billion years old and that humans share a common ancestor with apes, which I was told was incompatible with my faith" and "I left the church because I had learned more from Oprah about addressing poverty and injustice than I had learned from 25 years of Sunday school." Her list includes the fact that she never saw a woman behind a pulpit. I don't doubt that her list is genuine and an accurate reflection of her experience. And, this article isn't about her. What amazes me is how typical her list is on the interwebz. I'm amazed because, while there are very many reasons to leave church, these lists seem to be completely unaware of the Mainline Church. I grew up with a woman pastor, and I am 43 years old. I have a science degree as well as a theological degree. I grew up in the South and evolution was never challenged in my school or my church. I grew up in a Mainline Church that was a bit country club like, but as a youth I went on mission trips, worked at food banks, and was taught to love my enemy and give generously to the poor.

How is it that the Mainline Churches (to be more accurate), which have well over 20 million members in the US and which have been the main incarnation of Christendom in the US, have at the same time made no impact on how Christianity is viewed in the US? When Christianity is represented on television today, almost invariably the representative is a megachurch pastor, a televangelist, or the most conservative representation of a recognizable denomination. When people write their lists about leaving Church, they are not reflective of life in Mainline congregations. The millions of people who attend regular ol' Mainline churches that host food banks, shelters, are served by women priests and pastors, run day cares, build affordable housing, promote women's health, and base their communal life on the teachings of Jesus rather than focus solely on his death, are completely ignored. I find that simply incredible.

So, I thought I would list 15 Reasons Why I Am Tired of Lists about Leaving Church.

1. The Church, like all institutions, is flawed, filled with imperfect people, and will never be a full reflection of God's inclusive love. To think we can have a perfect Church is a lovely idea, but it won't happen. Ever.

2. Women pastors have been around a long time. In the United Methodist Church, we have been ordaining women for over 50 years. Want to see one? Come on over and worship with us.

3. Jesus spent his whole ministry healing, teaching, reconciling, confronting, challenging, and upsetting others. He never left. He went deeper in.

4. Individual spirituality is lovely. Communal spirituality is messy, difficult, challenging, boring, and the most wonderful thing a person will ever experience. It demands that we set aside what we want and requires that we focus on the need of others. Can't do that alone.

5. Lists about leaving Church include some kind of wrong done to people. (See reason number 1 above) People hurt one another; it happens. Now, the institution as a whole and the leaders in particular should be accountable for real abuses, but people often leave over little hurts as well as over legitimate real woundedness. It takes discernment to know the difference. One should never stay in a wounding experience. Yet, I challenge people to think about commitment to relationship before they leave over "someone was rude to me" reasons for leaving. Entering into covenant with others assumes the risk of being hurt, let down, and disappointed. Inasmuch as we do love one another, we also disappoint one another. The challenge is to find ways to extend and seek forgiveness.

6. Lists about leaving Church often include something about "boring" ritual. Yes, church can be boring. Everything isn't entertaining. Should worship always be boring? Absolutely not. Worship is intended to bring us into relationship with God and help us mend our relationships with our neighbors. Sometimes that is hard work. Sometimes that means the worship service is geared toward a topic more relevant to the person sitting next to me. Sometimes my mind is some place else. Sometimes it is a bad service. Sometimes I might get to encounter the Divine.

7. Lists about leaving Church are focused on how "I" have been affected. What about the church you leave? Perhaps they need your wisdom, your challenge, your words, your prayer, your presence, your time, your talent, your gifts. Just sayin'.

8. The Church as an expression of Christendom is dying, well, already dead. Kicking it when it's down seems mean.

9. The single largest provider of social services in the US, behind the government itself, is the Christian Church. As more people leave, all of those little food banks, shelters, lunch programs, and so on suffer. Recently, the governor of my state said that in the budget crisis that we face, churches will need to do more to plug the holes in social services. I laughed out loud. Really? And how might we do that with fewer and fewer members? People say churches aren't doing anything good in the world. They have certainly done bad in the world. But, today, Church houses, feeds, treats the ill, cares for the elderly, provides mental health services, runs clothing banks, runs after school programs, helps immigrants, assists people leaving domestic violence, mentors children, and so on. Not at a church helping people in need? Look a block over. There is one there that needs you to help them manifest the love of Christ in real and significant ways.

10. Childhood Sunday school lessons will not prepare one for adult challenges. Leaving the Church because a faith formed as a child is insufficient in the real world is like saying one is not going to the doctor because the bandaid purchased at the local drug store isn't stopping the hemorrhage on one's leg. A faith that questions and can withstand the assaults of real life must continually be formed, challenged, deconstructed, reconstructed, and explored.

11. Sacraments are wonderful expressions of God's love incarnate. Sacraments live with the Church and are found among the people. Water, wine, and bread. Things needed for life's road. Feast on them. Splash in them. They are pretty wonderful.

12. Lists about leaving Church describe an understanding of God which is pretty one dimensional. The Church is reimagining the meaning to which we are attached. Throughout our history, people have had to reimagine the character of God and our relationship with God. God is much more interesting than a one dimensional Santa character. Stick around and help us with holy imagining.

13. Lists, like this one, cherry pick easy things to target. Boo lists!

14. Lists often include something about music. To be sure, there are some horrendous songs sung in Church. Yet, I love hymnody. It's okay for sacred music to be different from what we listen to on the radio. But, should one need to rock out, there's a church out there that does that.

15. Lists about leaving Church almost all include something about being made to feel awkward when visiting. I can't refute this. This is legit. Straight up. No one should be asked to sign up for a committee, join the choir, or be chased down the sidewalk and begged to come back. My list is really 14 reasons.

*Throughout this article, you find the word "Church" and the word "church." "Church" with a capital "c" refers to the big organization of Church - all of us together. The little "c" church refers to local congregations.

Also, this article is not about Rachel Held Evans' post. She also has written a list of 15 reasons why she returned to church, which you can read here. Christian Piatt offers a different list here about leaving church. These are just two examples of a much wider phenom.

New Ministry - "The Well" Welcomes Robert V. Taylor April18

The second conversation leader at "The Well, a gathering place for conversation" will be Robert V. Taylor, former dean on Saint Mark's Cathedral in Seattle and current Chair of the Board and Executive Committee of the Desmond Tutu Peace Foundation.

Born in South Africa, Robert left his home under threat of imprisonment because of anti-apartheid activity. His mentor, Archbishop Desmond Tutu, helped him come to the United States.

He attended Union Theological Seminary in New York and worked in the diocese in New York until he was elected dean of Saint Mark's Cathedral in Seattle, WA, making him the first openly gay man to serve as dean in the Episcopal church.

Robert follows Wes Howard-Brook and Sue Ferguson Johnson to "The Well." The conversation will focus on his new book "A New Way to Be Human." Bernie Siegel, MD and author of "A Book of Miracles and Love, Medicine & Miracles" has this to say about the book:

“The wisdom of the ages is available to us from many sources. Robert V. Taylor shares his story and the lessons he has learned and makes this wisdom easy to understand through practical lessons and experiences. He is a wounded healer and in love’s service only the wounded healer can serve. So read his words and grow, bloom and blossom.”

To join the conversation, RSVP to www.thewellqueenanne@gmail.com or call 206-282-4307. Free tickets will be issued to you. Donations are welcome to help us continue inviting conversation partners.

For more information about the well, visit the website for Queen Anne United Methodist Church, home of "The Well."

Prayer of the Day for Lent 2B

Holy God, all that you promised your people came true in the person of Jesus Christ. He is your Word made flesh, your Wisdom in human form, your Justice in poverty, and your Covenant with breath. Through our Lenten journey, help us to examine our hearts fully and without prejudice that we might wholly embrace your covenant of grace. In these days, give us the faithfulness of Sarah and Abraham, that we might trust you to lead us and use us for your holy purposes. And, sustain us in the hope of Jesus Christ and by the power of your Holy Spirit. Amen.

The Bully Project is Coming - Check it Out!

In October of 2010, two other United Methodist clergy and I posted an "It Gets Better" video on youtube. Over the course of the past year, I have heard from many people about how moving it was for them to hear three pastors apologizing to queer youth for damage done to them by church. Even my more theologically conservative colleagues and friends agree with me that a child should never be bullied for being LGBTQI (or simply perceived to be LGBTQI). Bullying is not a Christian virtue!

We made the video because 2010 was a particularly bad year for queer identified youth. A helpful move is that attention is being paid to all kinds of bullying, not just bullying of queer identified youth. The horrible tentacles of bullying extend far beyond the LGBTQI community. Kids are bullied for all kinds of reasons - for being fat, thin, dark, freckled, pale, tall, short, male, female, poor, rich, smart, dumb, physically challenged, socially awkward, introverted, shy, or any other thing that sets them apart from whatever the dominant culture is in their particular situation. If a kid is Jewish in a Protestant area, odds are that he or she has been made fun of, even bullied, for being Jewish. If a kid is African American in a predominantly Euro school, odds are that she or he has been pushed around, been told at best insensitive things and at worst been subjected to painful verbal assaults. Being "different" puts us in the position of being examined, and all too often that results in awkward, insensitive, and even threatening situations. Let me say once more to any one who reads this blog: If you are different (whatever that means), it doesn't mean that you are less than those around you. If you are gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender, or intersex, you do not deserve to be demeaned, threatened, or harassed. Ever. Period. And, for all of those who mistreat you in the name of religion, I am both ashamed and deeply sorry. If you are mistreated for being an ethnic minority, a girl, poor, shy, awkward, or anything else, I hope you find a safe adult and tell them their plight. There are more of us out here than you might think.

I find it amazing that any of us make it through childhood and adolescence. Even those of us with loving families and mostly easy lives still go through growing pains, awkward adolescence, body image issues, and confusion about the world. For those kids who do not benefit from loving and supportive homes or who suffer silently with secrets or in fear, the situation becomes much more complex. Despite the awkwardness of growing up, let me be clear, bullying is not a normal part of growing up. It is not a normal stage of development. It should not be expected or tolerated in our homes, schools, faith communities, or community groups. Adults who become aware of bullying behavior have a duty to stop it in the moment and to make it crystal clear how very unacceptable the behavior is. That's our job as adults.

In their new documentary, filmmakers Lee Hirsch and Cynthia Owen focus on the stories of five families who have lived with the effects of bullying. These are just five families out of an estimated 13 million kids who are bullied every year. Simply entitled "Bully," the documentary will be released in select theaters on March 30 with a wider release in early April. Check your local listings. If you live in a small town, encourage your local theater to show this movie. Some movies are for entertainment; others are for life. This is the latter. For more information, the website for "Bully" is at www.thebullyproject.com.

New Ministry - The Well

I see that I haven't posted anything since January 24. That's a long time. Too long. But, the length of my time away doesn't reflect the amount of activity that has had me captured. One might say that the quieter I am here then the more active I am out in the physical world. What has kept me at bay? A new ministry. The Well.

"The Well, a gathering place for conversation" is a new ministry that will take place at Queen Anne United Methodist Church in Seattle. Geared to provide an intimate space for big conversation, "The Well" will bring scholars, teachers, activists, poets, dreamers, and all the rest of us together to delve into those things that touch our souls, minds, bodies, and communities.

Meeting weekly, at its simplest, The Well offers people an opportunity to go deep about issues affecting them, to ask questions about life and faith, and to enter into dialogue about these things. When does The Well meet? That will vary, depending upon the speaker, the topic, and the format. In general, meetings will take place on Thursdays from 6:30-8:30 in the church's sanctuary. Sometimes we will head out for a beer or a coffee. Sometimes we will meet on different days altogether. You will have to keep abreast of our calendar (still emerging).

Why The Well? In our highly partisan country, real discourse is becoming all too rare. In our churches, going deep is often difficult to do. The goal of The Well is to offer people who want to genuinely go deep in exploring matters of faith and life the opportunity, frame, and space to do so. The Well seeks to offer clergy a space to come and find community. It seeks to reach people who have left church because they have experienced sentiments that are anti-science, anti-question, anti-love, anti-inclusion. The Well is the opposite of all of those "antis." It is the perfect place to bring questions, loves, dreams, hopes, and concerns.

The Well is always open to the public. No expectation will be placed on anyone coming to The Well other than for them to honor their neighbor in conversation.

This is what we have lined up so far. The calendar will continue to evolve.

Schedule:

• March 1, 8, 15, 22 – 7-9 PM. Wes Howard-Brook and Sue Ferguson Johnson. Topic:“Coming Out of Empire, Moving into Christ”

March 1: “It was necessary to go through Samaria” (John 4)

March 8: “All I know, is I was blind and now I see” (John 9)
March 15: “Come out!” (John 11)
March 22: “I have given you an example” (John 13-17)
Wes Howard-Brook has an article in the Tikkun Daily that discusses his own Jewish-Christian experience.

• April 18 - Robert V Taylor. Topic: "A New Way to Be Human" Time TBA.
• May 12 – 3:30 PM and 7:30 PM. Grammy winning Singer/Songwritier Carrie Newcomer. Topic: Afternoon conversation on "Life as Sacred Story." Evening Concert.
• May 26-27 -- John Dominic Crossan. Topic: "The Lord's Prayer."
• June 6. Kathleen Norris. Topic: "Acedia."
• June 10 -- Jonathan Wilson-Hartgrove. Topic: "The Wisdom of Stability in a Mobile World."
• Summer - Jan Richardson.
• October 22 - Alexander McCall Smith.
• March 14, 2013 - Phyllis Tickle.

More to be announced soon. Not every week will be a conference or a structured workshop. Sometimes, we will just gather, pray, and talk. A website is being formed. Keep your eyes open. Send recommendations of topics and facilitators my way! I hope you enjoy this new ministry.

Daddy Dudes: Why I Love the PNW

Today I had a couple of conversations about people I affectionately call "Daddy Dudes." These are the guys who know how to use a circular saw and also how to love their children. One of the great joys of living in the Pacific Northwest is the sheer number of men I see every day who are equally comfortable in their masculinity and their role as a nurturer. (Before I receive emails telling me that men don't have conform to any particular picture of masculinity, STOP, and read on.) One of the many things that I like about the PNW is that for many of the men I know, see, and meet, conforming to such standards is simply a nonissue. Whether they like power saws, musicals, rock climbing, sewing, movie watching, or bowling, they are comfortable in their skin, and they are comfortable being hands on loving parents with their kids. That's what I'm talking about.

It isn't uncommon to see guys with babies strapped to their chests or backs walking Green Lake or riding a bus. Every day I see men pushing strollers, jostling crying babies in restaurants, and getting up (before their wives do) to change diapers. I know several men who decided to be stay at home dads while their wives continued with their day jobs...and they are completely unfazed by this arrangement. I know men who take their daughters rock climbing and pack up all three of their kids to go to the zoo. I know men who are contractors by day and bath time daddies at night. The men who reach out with their calloused hands to offer the gentlest of loving hugs to their children, you are magnificent! These are men who understand that their "manhood" isn't conditioned on their testosterone. These are men who awe me.

The reason this is on my mind is that Seattle megapastor Mark Driscoll of megachurch Mars Hill Church recently co-authored a book with his wife Grace on marriage and sex (not referencing it directly, sorry). The reviews have been passionate, simply fascinating to read. Like most things undertaken by Driscoll, this book has heated up quite a debate. Such attention is not new for Driscoll. Occasionally, he steps into the national spotlight because of his less than "orthodox" (pun intended) use of language, i.e. "harsh" words, his theology, and his off the cuff remarks. For those of us in the Seattle area, we hear more about Mark Driscoll than probably the rest of the world does, but he has made and continues to make an impression in the lives of new Christians all over the country.

Driscoll and his church are what are known as "complementarians," which is a word that describes people who believe that men and women are ordained by God to serve complementary but different roles in life. The flip side to complementarianism is often referred to as "egalitarianism" - men and women equal in all things. In complementarianism, men are the leaders of their churches and their homes and should love them as Christ loves the Church. Women are to serve men and to support them as the Church does Christ. This is an oversimplification, but you get the gist. There are many forms of complementarian thought. Mark Driscoll's form, and thus Mars Hill's form, not only prescribes roles, but teaches that "real" men behave, move, and act in very particular ways, and this view has periodically put Driscoll in the hot seat with other Christians, including Evangelicals and even other complementarians.

I don't want to take this whole post and focus on Mark Driscoll. Rather, I started this post because I wanted to thank those loving men whom I know and those whom I will never meet but see every day. I thank them for their kindness, their ability to withstand the Mark Driscolls of the world, their complete comfort in being who they are and loving the ones close to them. For all of the guys out there who have not been held prisoner by examples of brutal dads, distant dads, stern dads, harsh dads, and hands off dads, thank you. Every time you tuck in a child, give a bath, teach a child a song, show a child how to ride a bike, say I'm sorry, kiss your partner with gentleness in front of your child, hold hands, read a book out loud, embody humility, wash the dishes, laugh with joy, make the bed, do the laundry, cry, throw a ball, build a birdhouse, plant a garden, pray with your family, take out the garbage, celebrate your spouse's success, or do any of the millions of other things that you do every day, you are teaching the world what it really means to be a man - a responsible, comfortable in your own skin, adult man. When you embody these things without apology and with grace, you make the world a better place.

For all of the pastors out there who have told guys that they have to like and do Mixed Martial Arts, shoot animals, like guns, swear like a sailor, use anger as a first defense against all vulnerable feelings, or belittle others, I apologize. They may not know the damage that they have done, but I do. You may like some of these things. If so, go for it. But, if you don't, your worth as a man is not predicated upon your affinity for all things testosterone driven.

So, to all you Daddy Dudes, thanks and keep up the good work! For the men I see every day in the PNW, keep showing the world that you can build a house, a great community, and a lovely family all at the same time. We need heroes like you.

PS Another reason I love the PNW: Seattle Stay At Home Dads. Check them out!

TS Eliot and the Magi

Here is the crux of this year's Epiphany sermon at Queen Anne United Methodist Church. It seems to me that Epiphany calls us to go down new paths. More than that, though, in our time of intense international conflict and uncertainty, the idea of all nations seeking light to lead us all to peace is a wonderful thought.



Soon after his conversion and baptism in 1927, TS Eliot wrote “Journey of the Magi,” which begins:

‘A cold coming we had of it,
Just the worst time of the year
For a journey, and such a long journey:
The ways deep and the weather sharp,
The very dead of winter.’

Eliot wrote this poem during a time of deep personal and spiritual struggle. His marriage, which had been difficult for a number of years, was coming to a close. His newly forming faith demanded that he leave behind parts of himself to which he had grown accustomed. Everything was changing. New life was born out of a series of deaths. The poem concludes:

'All this was a long time ago, I remember,
And I would do it again, but set down
This set down
This: were we led all that way for
Birth or Death? There was a Birth, certainly,
We had evidence and no doubt. I had seen birth and death,
But had thought they were different; this Birth was
Hard and bitter agony for us, like Death, our death.
We returned to our places, these Kingdoms,
But no longer at ease here, in the old dispensation,
With an alien people clutching their gods.
I should be glad of another death.'

The story of the Magi, which culminates in the Adoration of the Magi on January 6 – Epiphany – is a story about uncertainty, journey, death, and birth. Many of us look back to the story of the Magi believing it to be part of our spiritual history, but, a more mature faith looks to the story as something much more meaningful. It is about us searching for God. We struggle. We search. We come to what feels like unsatisfactory endings to our travels only to be led down yet more paths to unknown destinations. We go through periods of deep uncertainty. Like the Magi, we little understand the culture or the ways of Jesus and his family. Like the Magi, we are distanced from them by space. Unlike the Magi, we are also distanced by two millennia; time is its own ocean we must cross to meet the Christ-child. Like the Magi, we must die to our gods in order to enter into the presence of the God of the Most High.

Epiphany is our celebration of the gift of ourselves to God. We bring all that we have – our best, our most precious selves and we kneel in awe and wonder at the miracle of the Divine One right here among us. Epiphany is for all who struggle and weep, for all who wrestle with God, for all who question whether we will find God at all. Epiphany is our way of experiencing together, if only for one day, a reality that is both in and outside of our world. God is here. In the humble places. In our fear. In our dreams. In the dirt, slime, and muck of the world. God is here. Despite our doubts. Despite our wars. Despite our greed. Despite our proclivity to wound one another. God is here. God knows the pain of birth, life, and death. God knows all that we experience because God experiences it with us. Birth and death. So close together. As we start our new year together, I wish you healing deaths and vibrant life. I hope that we, like the Magi, learn to die that we might live. I hope that we, Queen Anne UMC, can hear the beauty and the calling of the words of TS Eliot, whose own journey to the manger led him to realize:

'I had seen birth and death,
But had thought they were different; this Birth was
Hard and bitter agony for us, like Death, our death.
We returned to our places, these Kingdoms,
But no longer at ease here, in the old dispensation,
With an alien people clutching their gods.
I should be glad of another death.'